My latest assignment not only kicked me where it would be sure to hurt but it then proceeded to drag my already fragile ego to hell and back.
I’m so exhausted.
I like maths. I like using formulas to answer engineering questions and I get a real kick out of working something out on my own. However when I get stuck, which happens ever so often, I feel quite disappointed in myself.
I’ll kick and kick and kick myself down, berating myself for not bring smart enough and then kick myself down some more.
Not exactly productive behavior but humbling none the less.
There is no way I could possibly consider myself a know-it-all snob when I continue to remind myself that I have heaps to learn.
Of course it doesn’t escape my attention that I have learnt a lot so far, you cannot help but learn something when you are reading information and need to interpret it into your own words. You cannot do this without understanding what you are talking about. At least you cannot do it well. So I’m proud of myself in learning as much as I have but, I definitely can do better and I need to do better.